BARRIERS TO COMMUNICATION

TOO EAGER TO SPEAK.

It happens to all of us at one stage or the other – we want to make a positive impression, to come across well, as someone who is knowledgeable, approachable, balanced in response, measured, and wise – and yet despite our best efforts to impact and connect, we fail dismally. One of the most common barriers to communication is that we are often too eager to speak and not eager enough to listen. Nowhere is this more evident than when couples and families are confronting issues in conflict.

Research is clear, heightened emotions (both positive and negative) can be a major obstacle in the way of effective communication. We are often so busy thinking about what we feel we have to say, that we switch off and do not hear what someone might be saying … to our own detriment.

There is nothing more honouring to a person than listening with full attention to what they are trying to say and having heard and considered this, to only then respond.

Mediation models this type of effective communication for disputes. When used properly, and in such a way that each party gets a turn to listen and understand as opposed to being cajoled and manipulated with one-sided strong-arm techniques, it yields positive long-lasting results.